The phone rings and you know you should let it go to voice mail, but you answer it. While talking to a woman who can’t quite collect her thoughts you notice a fax coming through that needs immediate attention. You have 50 emails in your inbox that are probably junk mail, but you won’t know unless you review them – you can’t afford to miss a potential sale. You get a call waiting beep and it’s your daughter telling you that her friend Sarah’s mom can’t drive them to soccer practice and needs you to fill in. The airline fares for your upcoming family vacation increase at midnight, so you’ve got to order them now, but you still need to get the proposal written for the big account you think you can land.

All of a sudden, you remember the PASTRIES in the kitchen. You get off the phone and head straight for the kitchen. Just a bite will take the edge off, and it does. But why stop at a bite? It tastes so good! The stress has piled up and you need a break. A few quiet moments to yourself in the kitchen seem to calm you down. You didn’t intend to eat two, but you’ll skip dinner and be fine.

Does this pattern ring a bell? Are you a “stress-eater” who always has 10-20 pounds to lose? Perhaps you’re “good” all day but collapse in front of the TV at day’s end and devour a whole bag of chips.

Women in business have numerous pressures that can be overwhelming and food is often the easiest pressure valve we have. We justify our binges by telling ourselves “we deserve it”, but when our relatively new suit is too snug to wear and we’re embarrassed to see clients we haven’t seen in a year because of our weight gain, perhaps it’s time to rethink our faulty reward system.

As a businesswoman, former binge eater and founder of a non-profit helping people with weight loss, it is clear to me that stress is the primary reason women in business gain weight while rising to the top of their game. Granted, we all have stress, but rarely do we see the connection between our stress level and our eating. The fact is the faster we’re moving, the easier it is to reach for junk food and overindulge. Following these 3 important lifestyle changes will giving you a fighting chance to beat the battle of the bulge.

1. Learn to say “no”.
One of the hardest things for women in business to say is “no”; we hate to disappoint others, and we hate to admit our limitations. But not saying “no” – and having healthy boundaries with our time as a result – causes most of our troubles, especially overeating. The fact is that when we assume the role of “Wonder Woman” and take on far more than is physically, mentally and emotionally possible, we use food (and other substances) to power us through. Here’s the bottom line: If we expect to eat less, we have to do less. It’s not rocket science. Cut yourself some slack and eliminate one or two activities a week from your schedule. Ask for help with projects you’re stoically trying to handle on your own. Stay home a few nights a week. Making conscious choices that will decrease stress is vital if we expect any real change in our eating behavior.

2. Take a “time out” before dinner.
Most of us find that we are most vulnerable to overeating in the evening. During the day, we’re usually too distracted at work to cause much damage. But as soon as we walk in the door of our home, we head straight for the kitchen to find release. If we have kids, the hustle and bustle of home life begs relief more than ever. We find it in boxes and bags while cooking dinner as well as later when everyone is asleep and we finally settle down for some “me” time. Instead of using food to bring you down from a stressful day, try taking a “time out” before preparing dinner. Take 20 minutes in your bedroom for some meditation or a nap. Even just lying on your bed with some relaxing music will help. If your kids begrudge your 20 minutes, insist on at least 10. This “transition” period will help you unwind so that you can enter the kitchen and engage in family life feeling refreshed and energized from within without turning to food to carry you through.

3. Make your meals matter.
When we’re on the go we have no time to prepare and eat a home cooked meal. So we either skip meals or grab whatever’s handy and eat on the run – in the car, at our desks, or at the kitchen sink. We end up eating things we know aren’t good for us, and which we don’t enjoy anyway because we’re rushed; but we can’t see doing it any differently because we have so much on our plate (pardon the pun). The truth is that if we don’t have time to feed ourselves enjoyable, nutritious meals, we’ll be forced to find time for gym workouts, doctors’ visits, and Weight Watchers meetings! Our battle cry is that we “don’t have time”, yet don’t we always find time for what we deem important? It’s a grave mistake to regard “eating right” as a low priority when in fact there is nothing more important we could do. Try feeding yourself like you’d feed your children or an aging parent: put time, care and love into your meals. Make yourself matter by making your meals matter – you’ll be amazed at the difference!